Saturday, August 18, 2007

I finally put on make-up today...

and it's all for the benefit of a 1-year old. A cute 1-year old at that. TL has decided to let me spend the day with her "big sloppy puppy". I actually can't wait.

I know it sounds silly that I put on make-up...but I guess it's not just for Ryder-bear. It is really for me. To get my ass out of bed and into a more focused, positive mood. Especially when I'll be surrounded by an energetic little boy all day. I am excited and I am sure that Ryder will keep me on my toes which is just what I can't wait for.

There is an article that I was reading last night that I had been given the link to through this other yahoo group that I am a member of for Korean Adoptees (K@W).

"Do Parents Feel Differently About Their Adoptive Children Than Their Offspring?"- from the New York Mag. It took me about an hour to read it (because there were some paragraphs that were so appalling to me that I had to read them twice) but when I finally finished, I was left with this horrid, bitter taste in my mouth. I felt like I had just been fed a full-course meal of total bullshit. And I wanted a refund for that hour.

I want to write more on this article and critically piece it apart to figure out why exactly I didn't like it. It would be much easier for me to piece it as a whole and brand it with my seal of "Don't Read This Trash!" and be done with it. But this piece seemed to have been written with care (albiet hard to believe that it was) by the writer, and thus, I feel that I should take the time and care to analyze why I didn't like it.

I've been working on it some this morning, rereading some sections and really trying disect what it was that disturbed me so much. Was it the constant reminder of the Bradgelina adoption frenzy? Was it the mention of Madonna's baby boy? Was it the breakdown of how other people viewed their adoptions? Or was it because everything stated in that article was the horrible and utter truth - that the views held and the visions of those who carry forth the act of adoption are wrong -but that sadly everything in that article was true?

I'm not sure. At this time, it's a little bit of everything.

It also prompts me to question what brought this article about? Why all of a sudden are we trying to broaden our thought process as to whether or not parents feel differently about their adoptive children than their offspring?

As an adoptee, I have had my issues. I have had my battles, and I have had the struggles that most adoptees face growing up in America with white parents. I can only hope to shed a light whenever I do seminars or workshops or things like that, into the world of which I have grown to see myself.

For now, I must bid you all ado. I'll think more on this article over the weekend and might just have a nice blog about it by the end of Sunday.

BTW, how priceless is the woman who decided to adopt because God came to her one morning while she was jogging?

1 comment:

Bou said...

this is a reaaaaaally hard subject to wrap my head around. in my eyes...and i'll apologize right now if i sound like a freaking moron because of my limited 'sight'... but i find it hard to accept that piece of writing you referenced as an 'article'. if i make any sense. bloggings, yah, journal...even such as "Baby Love"...sure. because it's their individual experience. although a lot of ppl's reasons are the same. i think even the percentage combinations and the little deep down inside yearnings and callings that makes us individuals... make this a hard subject to generalize. i would love to hear ur thoughts on the 'article'. i'm too ADD myself to think from a supposed 'maternal' sense. i've been struck before by a very pure love for a child. but this was w/ the knowledge that i could give her back when the whining kicked in. hahahaa...