Monday, August 16, 2010

Since when do we pick and choose the definition of "freedom"?

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

That is the first amendment. Freedom of speech and respecting an establishment of religion...The government shall not prohibit the free exercise of religion. Shall NOT.

So why all of a sudden have we forgotten what it is to be an American? Why do we pick and choose? I know, I know - we're all guilty of it in some way. I know that I am. But this is serious, people. Our forefathers came to this country as immigrants, fleeing religious persecution in their own countries and trying to seek refuge in a land where they could worship peaceably the way they wanted to. Our very soil was given breath from the fruits of religious freedom and here we are, standing here in hypocritical glory, trying to persecute those who are seeking a place to worship their beliefs.

Do you not all see the irony in this? Do you not see how angering this is? We have thousands of thousands of soldiers overseas - fighting and representing our country and for what it's worth, fighting to protect and defend our civil liberties and our FREEDOMS as Americans. And one of those freedoms is religion and speech. Yet we condemn anything that is not familiar, and we walk around blaming others and pointing fingers and casting stones towards those we claim are insensitive. But who really is being insensitive here?

It's so frustrating and upsetting to see this country for all that it is today. It is frightening to know that one day I may have children who will grow up in a world where 'tolerance' and 'freedom' are words that are just words tagged with meanings that no one seems to honor anymore.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

This does NOT make me want to visit Detroit, and I have family there!

Oh man, just caught this over at Angry Asian Man. Cannot believe this is an actual commercial for my "adopted" hometown of Detroit... or can I?

Who was in charge of this campaign idea?! Ha! Apparently it has been running in airports...which makes me wonder how I missed out on this little beauty during my trips to the DTW...

As if the city of Detroit needed any further of a beating to its reputation, these commercials need to be filed in the "CEASED AND DESIST" folder, covered in some extraneous Gulf oil and burned - immediately. Not only does Detroit have to fight the rumors of its poverty (which are true as my eye has seen) but now it has to deal with "self-proclaimed" racist tourist commercials?!

Poor Detroit. I'll still come back to you. I know you've got some bomb ass sushi places tucked away in Lansing.

Saw this lady at Artscape this year and fell in love...

being the total nerd that I am, I absolutely fell in love with these tea towels!
You can find more of her stuff here.

I am a total science geek nowadays so these tea towels totally caught my attention among all the little shops and kiosks they had going on at Artscape this year. I took a ton more pictures though and hopefully when I get home tonight I'll be able to post them all for you. It was my little sister, Hannie's first time to the festival and she had a total blast (as I promised her she would!)

Monday, August 2, 2010

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

95 Southbound Traffic and Financial Independence

So I started my new job in Laurel this past two weeks and it's great. I really enjoy it - a lot of the aspects of previous jobs that I loved are the main aspects of this job now. Mainly, talking to people and scheduling things, making sure things are in order and of course, inventory.

It's funny now that I think about it - every single job that I have ever held - whether it was working in Nordstrom's as a saleswoman (or more appropriately, girl), shaving Hawaiian shaved ice in a house in the middle of Timonium, a top commercial construction administrator for a local bank (and virtually sinking ship that I was lucky enough to jump off of before it began its dive into the financial deep end) or as a claims representative/specialist...I have ultimately always been "stuck" (for lack of a better word) with being the same person you'd come to request your 0.2 ball point pens from Uniball. Oh, and what was that? You wanted to make sure it was GEL ink because you like how smooth it glides across those sticky notes as opposed to the generic ink pens they have boxes and boxes of still unopened in inventory? Okay, yes, I'll make sure to buy the sticky notes with alternating sides of "stickyness" before you have a HEART ATTACK and die because the sticky notes don't fit into your AWESOME BLUE-COLORED DISPENSER.

Call me weird or maybe according to Disgrasian, I am just owning up to my Asian-ness but I really love doing the inventory purchases.

I love the thrill of the chase. A dozen pens for $12.99? I bet I can find the same ones for HALF of that through some quick keyword searching on the office supply website. Ohhhh yeah. You know it's a turn on when a woman can find not one carton but TWO cartons of copy paper for $24.99 each. Boo yah, bitches. Doncha wish your girlfriend was HAWT like ME?

The only new adjustments that I have made with this new job is actually having a purpose to waking up so God forsakenly early. Before I was waking up at 3 or 4 AM and aimlessly flipping through my external hard drive to find a movie that I hadn't seen at least a dozen times to try to lull me back to sleep for another hour before I needed to head out to the gym. Now - I legitimately can wake up at 3 or 4 and head to the gym, get a nice hour workout in and then take a shower and head into the wonders that await me on southbound 95.

Perhaps it is because I started this job in mid-summer, but the traffic southbound hasn't been as horrendous as I expected that it might be. It has actually been quite pleasantly - save for an occasional stop-and-go here and there. I think for me the worst part is trying to get HOME. 95 north headed back to Baltimore from Laurel, if you're not out on the road at 4:30 pm on the dot is suicidal. And when I say suicidal I mean me banging my head against the steering wheel hoping to cause permanent hemmorage to my frontal lobe so that it may ease the HORRIBLE EXCRUTIATING PAIN that is the moving parking lot of 95 north. UGH!!

I have also been trying really hard to get back on the financial bandwagon. Not that I had fallen off completely, but you know - losing two jobs within a two year span is not the best thing in the world. Not something that I would wish even on my worst enemy (okay... who I kidding... I would, I would.) And it took me a year and some change to get financially stable with the job before last... and then I got laid off. And then I found a new job that gave me a significant pay cut, no benefits but the work hours of a work horse. No fun. And now I am at this job with awesome benefits, working my way hopefully to a brighter future. It's going to take some time but I've got patience even though sometimes it may not feel like it to myself. I just have to remember the bigger picture and realize that all the suffering today is worth tomorrow's win.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Racism is as racism does.

This is totally off the kilt of what I have been writing about as of late but I am sooo enraged right now by this "parody" letter that I read written by Tea Party bagger, Mark Williams. So enraged that I dropped him a little line on his website... he states that he enjoys reading what his listeners have to say so I figured I'd humor him just this once. Below is my submission:

Mr. "Mark Talk" or whoever the hell you think you are- You may think that because you are part of this "Tea Party" movement that you have some political entitlement to spew whatever comes out of your brain. But after just reading your "parody letter" written supposedly from the NAACP to the late President Lincoln, I am beginning to think that whatever thoughts you disperse with your "political entitlement" (And believe I use those terms with such enraged scoff) not only does NOT come from your brain, but more specifically comes from your ANUS. (Oh I am sorry, should my "coloredness" only allow me to use crude terms like ASSHOLE?) And by the looks of it, though I am sure that you would never publicly rebuke yourself, it seems that you have removed your letter from your site. Is it because you realized what a douche bag you really are? Or that the one line that your Tea-bagging ass shouldn't have crossed was calling the NAACP "racist"? Whatever the reason that caused you to remove your ridiculous letter from your site, I hope for humanity's sake that it's a strong enough reason for you to keep your thoughts to yourself for the rest of your life. 

To read Mr. Mark "the Talk" Williams' letter, check out the link for Disgrasian's blog here

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Sexy is that little black dress that fits like a glove

I decided to leave work earlier than usual today and soooo glad I did!!! Guess what was waiting for me when I got home?!?!?!

My birthday dress!! Which coincidentally makes me feel so incredibly sexy once its against my skin that I am going to have a hard time waiting till August to wear it and am already on the hunt for the perfect boots for this outfit. 
And while I am shoe shopping online -- I don't mind if I do just keep the dress on and take a few pics ... =) =) 

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Happy Early Birthday to me!

So I have been REALLY M.I.A. from this blog as of recently. It's been pretty crazy - lots of parties, lots of fun stuff going on, lots of just doing absolutely nothing when I get home from work. Hehehe.

On the real though, I have been on the up and up of attempting to get back into blog writing - especially since so much is happening in my life that sometimes I feel like I might lose all the details if I don't write them all down. I feel like I am growing way more sophisticated in my thoughts and feelings towards everything in my life - FINALLY. A huge step for me - it's always been so easy for me to get so wrapped up into things in the moment that I lose sight of really whats in front of me.

I keep promising to post photos on here. I have slowly been testing my photo legs in the shallow end of the photography pool. I am not NEARLY as talented or have "the eye" as some of my dear friends are but I can appreciate beauty and simplistic serenity - no matter where I am - so I try to capture those moments.

Anyways - onto the title of this blog it is to be seen by anyone who knows me, I have grown a huge fondness for fashion. I love all things asymmetrical, modern, clean and sharp. But then on a whole other spectrum I absolutely adore frill, lace, abstract and floral prints, bright colors. I try to mix and match as much as I can and find a few key pieces that I fall in love with and can't get anywhere else.

So it came to my HUGE surprise when my fave fashion blogger, Fashiontoast, aka Rumi Neely, designed her very own dress for RVCA. She says on her blog that she tapped into her Milla Jovovich circa The Fifth Element for the design of the dress and I absolutely adored it on the spot so much that I had to grab one for myself. =) Happy early Birthday to me!!! It'll probably be too hot to wear it in August but who cares -- I'll still wear it anyway.

Rumi's dress 

The Fifth Element

I got the dress in black because I don't really look good in all white like that. Now all that's left is finding the perfect shoe....I was thinking a Doc Marten boot in a patent leather to bring out the modern/90's feel of the dress. Or to take it up a notch, something like those Jeffrey Campbell's that I absolutely adore. =)

Monday, May 3, 2010

Exam Week and Car Troubles

Sooo exam #3 week is fast approaching and it's building this inevitable anxiety up inside of me that I just can't shake. Thus why I am up at 2 am in the morning thinking about HW, A & P lab notes and whether or not I'll be ready for exam #3 coming up in the next week and a half.

To make matters even more difficult, my car started making a sad and unusual buzzing noise. Well, at least in its modest beginnings the noise began as a "buzz" and soon escalated (rather quickly I might add) to a grinding sound. The kind of annoying, boisterous sound you'd hear on a douchebag's car that wanted you to hear him coming 50 miles away. Yeah...that sound.

I had J take a look at it today and he thinks it might be the water pump (?). I put that question mark there not because I question his judgment. On the contrary, I have the utmost faith that even his assumption based on just viewing what was underneath my hood is quite accurate. That question mark was for the fact that I had not even a clue that I even had a water pump underneath the hood of my car. Haha. Oh go me!

J advised that it was NOT the smartest thing in the world for me to be riding my vehicle around and that as soon as possible (Read: TOMORROW, ermm... TODAY, I mean) I need to take it into the shop to get it officially diagnosed and repaired. Note the word: need. As in necessity. As in drop everything I was going to do and make sure that I am able to have the transportation to even ACCOMPLISH the things I need to get done.

Thus, it goes without saying, it put a HUGE damper on my weekend events. I was supposed to be going to Kish's Bachelorette Party on Saturday, but that's when the noise really started to escalate. That afternoon it went from a slight annoying buzzing sound that became louder when I accelerated to a loud cranky grinding noise that occurs every single time I turn the ignition. Great, I thought. I had this horrible vision in my head that my car was going to blow up at any second...and when I approached J, he advised me to stay off the roads. Which totally bummed me out in more ways than one.

I also never got to go to the grocery store nor to pick up my photo prints for class. I never got to return that sweater that I bought at Anthropologie (seen as a dire necessity at the time that the fabric met my skin and I stared in the mirror but slowly lost its rung on the priority ladder when I came home and looked at the stark reminder of how much I actually paid for it on that little sub-conscious meter we call a RECEIPT) nor did I get a chance to return that one thing from Burlington Coat Factory that I had picked up for my Mom that she had decided she didn't want after all.

The good thing out of this weekend was an impromptu hang out on Saturday morning/early afternoon to the pool to enjoy the nice weather and catch some sun and ALSO to be saved by the day from the Russian who most notably looked up online about my Toyota warranty and showed me that my engine warranty was still valid until 56,000 miles! (I am currently at 39,000.) That's a whole whopping $600 I am saving that I had nightmares about all last night and this morning about having to pay!

Here we enter into another week and even though I wanted so desperately to get into work early today, I know that's probably not going to be possible seeing as I have this car thing to take care of. And I know it's rather serious enough that I cannot just be meandering along with getting the repair done (as I am so often the culprit of doing so when it comes to getting my oil changed).

At least the weather will be  nice out.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Torry Hansen: Worst F&*%ing Mother of the Year (& my hope that this means stricter screenings for prospective adoptive parents)

Of course I'd have something to say about this.

Am I outraged? Hell yes. Am I pissed off? Effin' yeah I am pissed off. Do I want to write massive amounts of hate mail to Torry Hansen? Do I ever....

This story is just devastatingly maddening, sad, and utterly effing ridiculous - down to each minute detail and play-by-play of this horrible monstrosity of a situation. From a 7-year old boy spending 6 months in a NEW country with a NEW language and a NEW mother, the failure of the adoption agency that facilitated the adoption to properly screen their prospective families, the idiocy of the agency to allow this little boy to enter the United States into this family's home, the idiocy of the ADOPTIVE parent(s) to fully educate themselves on what they were getting themselves into prior to having the child brought into their home...Not to mention the fact that this poor little 7-year old boy now has to deal with the effects of being abandoned not once, but TWICE??

I have read a lot of articles about this in the past week or so that the story broke. Have I read them ALL? To be honest, no, I haven't. But the majority of the articles that I have read state the same thing - the effects that this one grandmother's ludicrous actions now have on the rest of the prospective parents waiting for their Russian adopted children and also the fate of the many Russian orphans waiting to be adopted in the orphanages currently. CNN has also expressed many people's displeasure (among them mostly the Russian people) at the fact that this Ms. Hansen (the grandmother of Torry Hansen) will NOT be punished for her inhumane deed.

Let me just tell you what I think... First of all, I think there is foul play afoot with this grandmother business being involved altogether. Torry Hansen, let me reason with you for a second, you dumb b*^ch... I am going to make the astute assumption that you're more than of legal age. Obviously, you had some ounce of compassion in your bones to even initiate the adoption process which can be long and arduous, I understand. And you wait for this beautiful, innocent child to come from a world of abandonment and suffering that you might not ever have the capacity to comprehend and things just don't turn out the way you thought they would. But why on earth would you have your MOTHER take care of the "dirty work" for you?!?!!?!?! Are we not a grown woman enough to adopt the child but we can't be "grown" enough to take responsibility for that same child's life???? WTF WOMAN?!?!?!!?!

They haven't released any photos of your mother, this illustrious Ms. Hansen, but I can only imagine that due to your geographical location of Tennessee that she is a spineless fat f&$k that weighs 200 lbs and has missing teeth...basically, an ignorant piece of trash.

I could tell you what I would hope would be the outcome from this outrageous story. But I am afraid to even waste my breath because as sad as this story is, it isn't the first time that something like this has happened. And not just to Russian adoptees but any and ALL international adoptee children.

All I know is that I am googling the sh*t out of this woman Torry Hansen and writing as many letters as I possibly can to any and everyone that will want to listen to try to get her and her grandmother some type of sentence. That child, regardless of his behavior, has been through more tumultuous heartache than anyone will ever know and despite this "shipping him back", he is STILL a US citizen and has RIGHTS that they decided to ignore because "they couldn't handle it anymore".

My question to all of you is...if you have a biological child and they turn out to be psychopaths or violent - can you take them somewhere to have them shoved back into your uterus to "bake" a little longer?

You cannot treat adopted children any different than biological children in that respect. You wanted that child, you now have to deal with the consequences, Torry Hansen. And I hope you go to hell.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

happy days are new spring dresses and warm sunshine

Totally love love LOVE the new dress I found in Target (Targe-t with the silent T!) and am rocking it out today in celebration of the amazing weather.

I have decided that I am going to take more pictures, upload more pictures onto this thing and just stop being so lazy. Because that's all that has been stopping me... sheer laziness.

In other news, will be taking my Psych 101 test this weekend. I had originally planned to take it later in the morning but upon further review, a friend of mine has enticed me to join her to DC to the Cherry Blossom Sakura Matsuri Street can I pass that up? Every year that I fear I will miss the Cherry Blossoms, something marvelous springs up unexpected in my events and prompts me to go. (Thanks Ester! =))

Cannot wait to take my new Canon Powershot to the festival this year. Last year my trusty Fujifilm companion took the photos but was on its last leg so a lot of the photos lacked a certain quality to them. I am more than excited to see how the pictures are going to turn out this year!

Hope everyone is enjoying the weather!!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

New store full of awesome goodies...

Just found this new online store full of endless possibilities for a new spring wardrobe...have I mentioned that recently one end of my closet fell off? A visitor to my dwelling informed me that this was a sign that I had TOO MANY CLOTHES.

...which is a travesty that I do not believe could ever be possible!

But in my defense - I have been removing articles of clothing for every new one that I buy. I think it's the best way and not everything fits the same after so many years. And not everything is the same style that you used to have either.

A nice surprise was a dress that I had in the back of my closet that I had bought over four years ago. Never wore it before...EVER but had taken it to the beach with me and J numerous times as a possible "dinner dress" but never knew how to wear it. Suddenly had a fashion revelation the other day before work to pair the dress with a cute white laced tank that I had from B.R. and voila! An acceptable Easter outfit was born!

Here is that website... Bona Drag. I think it is out of California.

=) =) Love life and sunshine!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Earring Prospects for my outfit for the Wedding

Last weekend when J and I went to Tyson's (to help him find the last few things to complete his suit) I went into this really neat little Japanese-owned jewelry store. The stuff was all pretty reasonably priced but disguised to look like it cost more. I was able to find a couple of cute bracelets that I liked in a yellow that I think matches my shoes for the wedding dress, so I snatched them up! (I'll post a picture of them later!)

But now I am stuck with trying to figure out if I really like the shoes I bought for the wedding and how long I will be able to stand BEING in them for a long period of time (especially since I will be helping before and after the ceremony). I hate that I have to think like this when it comes to shoes. I absolutely love clothes shopping and could go on and on and on...but when it comes to my shoes, I get easily depressed because I am so limited due to the cerebral palsy and the offset in my gait.

I also still need to find a pair of earrings. Yellow, of course, to fit my color scheme, but maybe just a little bit off? I want them to be dressy enough to wear to a wedding, but not too much that I couldn't wear them again. I just found a bunch of Anthropologie's website that I totally adore...what do you think?

Monday, March 15, 2010

Vivid Dreams

Ever since I can remember, I have always had vivid dreams. Dreams that were so real that I could have sworn that they had happened to me before and when I would mention this to my parents when I was younger and verbally capable of sharing my dreams with them, they would always say it was just a case of "deja vu". But as I have grown older, and my dreams have become more vivid, more sporadic, more radical and life-like, I have been having a hard time accepting that they are all just a part of "deja vu".

Because some of my dreams are of events that I have never experienced in my life, nor do I have any prior experience or knowledge to fall back on that could revert into my dream life. In my dreams I have been a young mother shielding her baby in an active warzone through a seemingly 1960s South Korea; I have been a driver in a vehicle on a drag at high velocity speeds but knowing there was something wrong with my vehicle and not having the capability of stopping it. I have been a lounge singer at a hotel bar, my black dress cascading along the grand piano as I sat next to the piano player, drinking a scotch on the rocks and singing my songs through the clouds of cigar smoke. I am not a singer. I have never been to a hotel bar before (save for the one in the middle of the Hilton in Stockholm) and I don't drink scotch. I don't know where these illusions of a life come from nor where they transform from in my real everyday life.

Last night I had the weirdest dream of all. I was at what seemed to be a college dorm. My college dorm. (I never dormed at college...but I dated plenty of people who did) There was a party that was going on in some kind of main hall or small conference room, I am not sure which and I am not sure that it mattered much. What I distinctly remember is that I was sitting next to my boyfriend, a boy about 20 years old who looked to be Chinese. He had semi-long hair and a soft smile and he seemed very kind. But the food that was at this party was such a wide array of cuisine. I remember distinctly that there was a soup that my boyfriend was encouraging me to try - it was a soup that had some kind of large piece of swine in it. I want to say that it was a huge pig's feet, but I realized that each person's bowl of soup had a totally different portion of the swine in it. It had a wretched smell and I remember being able to smell how terrible it was - something like a sour gym sock mixed with the worst cheese smell you can imagine. I also remember feeling the steam rise up from the pot and brush my face. I remember feeling that warmth against my cheeks. But what is even more disturbing about this dream is what happened next...

As my boyfriend is going down the potluck line (I am guessing it was a potluck line but something tells me that I am not far in my guess) he kept putting more and more random things on my plate. A pastry here, a mashed potato there, rice and some pilaf here. And all of a sudden I felt the  ground shake from underneath us. I was suddenly overcome with this sense of fear and wasn't sure why. I looked at him and I saw this grave look wash across his face. And in the next instant, I saw one of the other partygoers rush to the window and open the blinds and in the distance we could see a tornado coming our way. It was so vivid. I could see the graying of the skies, and I could see this massive tunnel of darkness whisping and luring so heavily in the distance, but it was moving faster and faster towards us. I turned to my dream boyfriend and asked him what we should do. He said to get down, to find somewhere safe to hide and something stable to hold onto.

Now this next part makes no logical sense. I remember watching through the window as I ducked underneath this table that was near one of the pillars in the room and saw the looming tornado heading straight towards me. I felt the ground shake and the movement of the building become more ominous and scarier as the tornado moved. I couldn't find my boyfriend at this point ... I could hear his voice and for some reason I knew he'd be safe, and that he had found a separate place to stay.

But so vividly, blog, I can't even stress to you. I saw the tornado RIP the building wall away. I felt the wind tug at me as it tried to pull me with it. I felt the rain that it brought shutter and drench my face and my clothes. I felt the leaves and the branches that it brought in its wake scrape and cut at my skin and my legs as they dangled helplessly against the force of the tornado's power.

And I gripped for my life onto that pillar, praying that it would be over soon and that I'd be safe. And just like that, before I knew it, I woke up.

Weird, huh?

Monday, March 8, 2010

The birds are chirping!!!

When I got to work this morning, I could hear the birds chirping outside the building and it made me smile. Whenever I feel the sunshine and hear birds chirping in the early morning it reminds me of when I was a little kid, waking up early every morning once spring started to inch its way past winter's remaining snow piles.

This is the beginning of spring and I cannot wait for it to begin! Day trips to go shopping in Georgetown or Tysons Corner. Trips to the Smithsonian for museum-hopping.

But I know that this means first, we must get through the "showers" part of the spring. And boy have I heard that we'll be getting our share of rain!! Hopefully it won't affect me too much - usually rain makes me super sleepy. =/

Something refreshing!

This is an amazing organization run by the Moore family. Dr. Andrew Moore, his mother and two of his brothers are continuing the tradition that his father set so many years before: to provide the community with quality healthcare.

Developed for the "working poor", Surgery on Sunday has helped over 1,500 patients and offers free healthcare and surgical procedures for those without health insurance or financial means to cover necessary medical expenses.

If you're interested, I strongly recommend everyone to look into aiding or donating to this organization! At a time where our economy is in a meltdown and trying to rebuild itself, there is no better way to help our fellow neighbor, friend, family and loved ones by establishing an access to the healthcare that everyone deserves to receive.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Casualties of War Art Exhibit

Just watched this video on CNN about a young artist from California named Emily Prince whose work is now being shown in an art gallery in London.

Not only is Prince's project profoundly breath-taking and touching, but the technique that she uses to approach each portrait is incredible.

Beginning in 2001, Emily Prince decided to create portraits of all of the U.S. casualties from the on-going wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. They are all done with black ink and she uses different shades of paper to represent their race.

I wish I could travel to London to see the exhibit. It looks amazing. But in the meantime, please check out Emily Prince's website.

A historical day in D.C.

I saw this on Disgrasian this morning and can I just say that I am positively elated!

It is so refreshing to know that our capital has now recognized same-sex marriages and that 171 couples were able to legally marry to their life partners Wednesday morning.

Even awesome-r? Newly wed couple #3 have to be the cutest Asian lesbian couple I have ever seen!! Gotta represent! Congratulations to all of the newlyweds!

Now I guess my dream of one day marrying Natalie Portman CAN become a reality. ;-)

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Stressed out to the max

Currently running on -2000 hours of sleep it feels like, but to be more realistic, I'll say 0 hours. Because that's how many hours of sleep I have had in the past 48 hours.

I am so worried about this exam tonight. I don't feel as confident as I should with the neurotransmitters. ACK! I wish I could skip to tomorrow or tonight even, when this exam is over and I have accepted my failure. *le sigh

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

When in doubt, this is what Wendy's would like you to do.

"Do what tastes right."

I assuming this means that if it doesn't look right, Wendy's would still say "Go for it". And if it didn't smell right, well, maybe it's just slightly wrong. But the REAL testament to righteousness is if it tastes right. OF COURSE!

How wrong would THAT be?

I can just see now a bouncer outside of a nightclub checking IDs at the door. A young girl hands him her ID and he waves it away with his hand.

"No, I don't need that...just give me a little taste," as he takes a lick of her arm.

"Yeah, no way, sweetheart. You taste about three months shy of being legal."

So remember, just do what TASTES right. If it doesn't taste right, then just say no.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

This weekend!!!!


Not only is it JOHNNY DEPP. Not only is it TIM BURTON. But it's also one of my favorite pieces of literature (right up there with To Kill A Mockingbird and The Catcher in the Rye). 

I have been anticipating this movie for TWO years!!!! I heard about it being leaked on a film blog two years and almost died of pure unadulterated excitement. Cannot --- I repeat, CANNOT wait to see this movie! 

What a way to end such a crappy week of testing. Not only do I think I failed miserably on my Health 101 exam, but I think I did TERRIBLE on my Chemistry 107 as well (which is even more heart wrenching since it's my third time taking the class) AND I got a 76% on my Psychology 101 exam that was ONLINE (which is a disgrace since I guess I could've looked up the correct answers had I had enough sense to do so). 

I am hoping that I can turn this rough beginning to a school year around. At least now I know what to expect with each teacher.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Just in case inquiring minds want to know

Because you know I did.


To get on my good side...

You could bribe my happiness out with any one of the following items. (Who knows? You could get a tax write-off for it if you label it as "gift". Don't they give tax write-offs for gift-giving to the "Totally Fabulous"?): 1. This ring. Found out about Digby & Iona through a recent post off of What Claudia Wore (one of the many fashion blogs that I read on a daily basis). Immediately fell in love with their jewelry, especially since jewelry has become a recent fun fashion 'discovery' for me. It all started with FINALLY getting my ears pierced on my 24th birthday last year and ended with me constantly on the lookout for amazing necklaces, rings and bracelets to add to my budding collection. Yet another thing to break my bank over...but totally worth it. You can check out more of Digby & Iona's collections here.

2. These sandals. Because they look cool. And they are my absolute FAVORITE shade of gray. Did I mention that they look cool? BECAUSE THEY DO.

3. This jacket. I am in love with drapey fabrics. (Do NOT mistaken this for "billowy"!) Anything that cascades, criss-crosses or has any sort of sewn design that allows the material to sway when I move. I have been on the hunt for a jacket that had a criss-cross/drapey/odd shape to it since I was introduced to the black mini biker jacket from William Rast last season. It was a mistake to have allowed myself to let that fabric touch my skin. As soon as I had it on, I had to have it. Or at least something like it. This isn't quite "biker jacket" style, but this jacket definitely fits the bill of unusual and eye-catchy. And I'm all about eye-catchy.

EDITOR NOTE: Need Supply, Co. has become my current fashion obsession. Not only do I have it saved in my favorites, but I am half tempted to make it my home page for as long as their buyers keep bringing me delicious shoes and clothing on a regular basis.

Creativity Neurons Are Dying

I feel like the creativity within my brain has been going numb recently.

Okay, that might have been a slight use of hyperbole...Perhaps just the writer's mentality of my creativity is what I feel to be numb.

With all the endless Psychology, Health and Nutrition and Anatomy and Physiology chapters I have perused countless times in the past three to four weeks, I imagine the little community of writers that I had so pleasantly tucked inside the recesses of my brain to jot out my poems, essays and blog posts for me are now retreating in horror to the masses of factual nonsense I have overloaded my brain with.

And yes, don't be too envious that I had a miniature community of writers in my brain. Oddly enough, they are quite the cheap little labor unit, finding sustenance purely on a hearty diet of onomatopoeia, alliteration, SAT vocabulary and maybe an iambic pentameter thrown in now and again. (A superb, flawless iambic pentameter is like crack cocaine to them, apparently. I mean the really good stuff, as they say.)

I guess if I gave any more thought to the fact that it has been YEARS since I have allowed myself the luxury of rekindling my romance with poetry and prose, I might find myself a bit depressed. There are times when I am walking to class or through the grocery store when the observant writer in me kicks in - I catch a glimpse of an unusual character, a piece of conversation flowing through the air, a piece of jewelry on someone that might illicit an interesting back story - and my mind is suddenly reeling with ideas, phrases, descriptions, questions and answers... but just like that, as imminent as their arrival was to my brain is as quick as their demise. Like sparklers that did not ignite enough energy from the matchstick to carry the spark for its full lifetime and as quick as the combustion hits the air it flickers for a second before blowing away.

So the best I can say to myself is that I am trying... writing has always been my guilty pleasure, my solace and my comfort. My goal is to ease myself back into writing full time as I did once before and I am thinking that the best way for me is to just start blogging randomly about things of interest and the more I practice and 'compost', the more my writing will sustain and improve. =)

Here goes nothing...

Friday, February 19, 2010


Doesn't it seem like every time something goes wrong or becomes stressful, everything else seems to follow suit?

The beginning of this year felt like it was going to start out strong but since January all I have had is a lot of stress. A shit-ton of stress, to be more precise.

I realize that for me - every once in a while I need to surround myself with the specific people that just make everything seem minuscule and obsolete when even the worst tends to start crashing down around me.

But this week has been filled with just feeling as if certain individuals are avoiding me, not answering legitimate questions, and not holding up to the basic standard of honesty is best policy. Which really grinds my gears.

What's even more frustrating is that my two best friends are in their MIA statuses this week - one, I haven't seen in over a month and one that I will not have seen in over a month by the time she gets back from New Zealand (lucky bitch!).

And so, I sit here, with a very hungry stomach, with co-workers that seem to be taking ALL DAY to take their lunch break, and me left wondering what the hell is going on with everyone in my life this week?

Saturday, February 13, 2010

"Death and All His Friends"

When I was younger, I had an overwhelming sense of fear over the prospect of death.

Possibly a bit too morbid, I am aware, for a 9 or 10 year old mentality, but I can grasp at a handful of distinct memories where I would wake up from terror nightmares of imagining what death would be like. At that age, I had no way of having any real depth perception as to what death entailed other than the image of what I saw in movies or TV (probably some episode of McGyver to blame for my fugitive imagination, no doubt).

I can vaguely recall the recurrence of these sleepless nights always beginning with me lying in bed, trying to be utterly still with my mind wandering off slowly. Once I could hear only the bugs outside my bedroom window chirping and buzzing softly, I found myself wondering if this is what death would be like. Don't ask me why, because for the life of me, I have no idea why I would have ever imagined something like this - but I do remember feeling a lot of fear. A lot of angst. I guess I had learned early on through my surgeries and physical therapy as a kid that the preparation for the experience seemed to make the experience itself less upsetting, less frightening. I wanted to know what death was like so I'd be ready.

So I'd lie in self-absorbed solitude for what seemed like forever (which means 3 minutes - tops) until I would suddenly realize that I hadn't been breathing that whole time and would scare the bejeebus out of myself once I gasped for air.

Long story short, none of my meager exploits into the minute life cycle of pre-mortem ever led to any acquiescence about death (with no surprise).

I recently realized that now, even as I delve deeper into my studies to what will eventually (and hopefully) become a career in medicine, I still have no idea what I think death is really like and whether to fear it or accept it for myself. But what I do know is that I fear death for everyone else on this planet. I fear the death of my parents (from either family), I fear the death of my sisters, my brothers, my neighbors, that guy that price checked my Mac & Cheese at the grocery store, the woman who held open the door for me today at REI...

because as I enter these trepid waters of medicine, I take on that responsibility. I am excited, anxious and cautious with a little bit of scared-shitless thrown in there. I know I can do it - deep within the recesses of my brain are all the necessary neurons to succeed. But I would be lying to all of you if I didn't admit that every now and again a little doubt is thrown my way. Maybe it's a bad grade here, a four-hour study session that ends with me killing more brain cells than I know those are the times I need to step back, take a deep breath, and realize that I can do whatever I put my mind to as long as my heart and perseverance is in on the same goal.

I promise to myself to keep writing in this thing - no matter how ominous it might seem. I believe that writing will always be my trusted compass. For whenever I fall off the broken path, once I sit down to write, I allow myself to bare my soul without ever really realizing it.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Preserving Hilarity

I have been blessed to have best friends that have very similar senses of humor to my own. (And believe me, sometimes my sense of humor is quite twisted.) I had gotten this idea not only from but from several other fave blogs of mine.

Because my friends and I share a common marrow component in our funny bones, I usually get the most random and yet hilarious responses via text from them. Some of them I try to hold onto for as long as I can and have even resorted to placing some in a separate folder on my phone, hoping to preserve their funniness for my enjoyment on days like this past Saturday... where the snow had to barricaded in my house!

So instead, I'd like to put a few of the funnier ones up here before they get discarded for more phone memory. I have a feeling that a lot of them (if not all of them) insist on some sort of retardedly prepubescent inside joke my friends and I have cultivated from our conversations, but nonetheless, here they are:

"Hehe. I'm a gateway drug ...breakin down barriers everywhere!"

"Too much cat sexay goin on"

"Maybe he's on sushi driveby service?"

"I just overheard a lady telling another lady how she wishes she could wear a onesie. OMG."

"So its you and the crackheads. Must be quite entertaining!"

"Yeah, man. He's like a jelly-filled powered donut!"

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Been a whole year...

I have been MIA for a whole year! I keep trying to get back into the writing in my blog thing - it'd be the total understatement of the year if I said that SOOOO much has happened to me in 2009, but all in due time.

I have a ton of photos to weed through, a ton of things to talk about, and sooner than later I'll be able to get through all of it! <3

I hope all of you had an amazing holiday time! I know I did, a nice relaxing Christmas with my close best girlfriend and family and a new year celebration that I can only hope to top next January!!!

I'll be back soon...with a vengeance. ;-)