Bulgogi Withdraw

Omgoodness...how long is it going to be till I have the sweet and succulent taste of bulgogi in my mouth? How long I say?!

It's like this: I am sitting in my bed, all snuggled up with the most erotic of readings (American History: A View on the New World from its Beginnings to 1588. Don't lie, it's a page-turner for you, too) and watching American Idol (because c'mon, gotta represent my love for PAUL KIM!!!) and my stomach starts growling.

Don't begin to mention that I had already gorged myself on food (and some left over cake I had managed to salvage, heh heh heh) or that I had been snacking on CHIPS (horrid, horrid, horrid) for the past, oh, let's just make up a short amount of time, say like 5 minutes? And now all of sudden, my stomach decides that its hungry. And not just for anything...for bulgogi.

Last time I ate bulgogi was in December...DECEMBER! Do you realize that means its been a whole 60 days or so since I have tasted bulgogi? And even though we had meat on J's birthday, for me, nothing comes close to the taste of the homeland.

Which reminds me...is this year going to be another year of traveling? I was talking to JV tonight and he was trying to convince me to go back to the Motherland. I am not sure if I am ready for all that yet. I keep going back and forth with this idea and notion that going back to Korea would be like creating a peace inside of myself. But at the same time, I feel like I would be unable to do it alone. I kind of also want to wait until school is finished, which will only be a few more years...but then I could argue the point that you never know how many years you have left.

It's a layered cake situation. That's what I call something that is super complicated because cake is one of those things that is bittersweet. It's a special occasion when you have some, but afterwards it leaves you with a slight guilt because of all the layered goodness that it has. And the more layers it has, the more you have to love and hate it for. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what adoption/birthfamily issues have become for me. A layered cake situation.

But damn, what I wouldn't give for some bulgogi right now...