Tuesday, June 26, 2007

If I were a super hero...

my kryptonite would be overanalyzing everything.

Thus why I probably wouldn't last very long as a superhero. As soon as there was trouble, I'd spend more time trying to analyze the situation than saving anyone.

I worry constantly about things I really shouldn't worry about. I don't know how to stop this. There are moments where I can see myself getting "bitchy" - meaning that I care just a little bit less than usual about issues that I would usually worry my ass over. But even then, honestly, I secretly continue to worry.

I should be so excited about going on vacation the next few days. And I am, to a point. I get to go away, and that's always fun - but I am still finding myself sitting here, analyzing and worrying. Don't try to ask me about what - because I couldn't even begin to give you specifics. That's how pointless my worrying and overanalyzing can get.

Okay, it's like this - I am sitting here, and in the distance, I see several beautiful, snow-covered mountains that I know I have to eventually climb. This excites me. Why? Because I love adventure, I welcome change, and I love a good challenge. But this journey also worries me because I know adventure doesn't always mean non-stop fun and although I know I am equipped with the strength to get through my past adventures - am I ready for what's in store ahead? And yes, I welcome change, but let's face it, I am a chicken and a hypocrite because I can only deal with the change if I was the one that instigated it. And this challenge is terrific but I certainly know the last adventure I went on I had a great group of friends - but things change (as stated just previously) so will I this time? Everyone, like me, seems to be at different points in their life...and although the prospect of me facing those mountains alone is not an entirely new concept to me, I'm going to admit honestly that I am scared sh-tless.

I know roughly where I want to be in the next five years. I have this dotted line on my map of life that I know is roughly about where I want to go. But nothing's definite. I'd never write out my schedule in a Sharpie because life is never as simple as bold, permanent color.


BTW - this is how much I rock:

40% GeekMingle2 - Free Online Dating

1 comment:

Latoya Peterson said...

57% - looks like I out geek you!